The Black Army travelled to Stamford to be met with perfect rugby conditions despite the recent inclement weather. Unfortunately the usual abundant squad was heavily depleted due to a series of injuries and bouts of cowardice. However, a re-jig in the back row saw Smokin’ Joe move to scrum half and Llama strut his stuff at outside centre.

The game kicked off and some excellent forward work from captain Hightower and Shotgun provided excellent ball for Special to make a trademark jinking run and release Champion George who unselfishly/accidentally offloaded to Llama who romped home from 50 metres for the first score. Having left himself at least 5 seconds until the pursuing Stamford players caught him, Llama managed to apply downward pressure without dropping the ball or throwing it forward - all of those involved with the specialist coaching of this particular skill beamed proudly from the sidelines. A fine conversion was only narrowly missed from out wide (he was nearly Great Casterton after all).

Almost immediately Kesteven went on the attack again and produced a second try which was almost a carbon copy of the first, but this time Champion George gave an outrageous dummy to an outrageous dummy and glide through the defence to touch down for his first try on the season. Conversion missed.

Stamford then began to make up with some strong running from their number 8 and inside centre. However, Kesteven were unrelenting in their defence, with strong tackling from Jacko and a huge tackle from Davey Hodgson.

Monster then used his strength to rip the ball from Stamford and began a bullocking run downfield. Eventually Monster realised that a prop running the ball in from inside his own half would get him banned from the Front Row Union and the ball was recycled and a lovely pass from Special released DanDan to set off on a determined run, eventually he was brought down and the ball was fed to Llama to run in his second try under the posts. Adman/Mr Blond's conversion was the best since St Paul's 'Road to Damascus' experience.

Half Time 17-0

Stamford began the second half with great endeavour but were continually thwarted in their attempts to get on the score sheet by the men in black, Nightmare (all will become clear), returning from rhinoplasty and obviously still bristling from being Kieran Taylor's younger brother, was prominent in keeping the home side at bay continually making a 'Nightmare' of himself (do you see?). H also continued his outstanding season with some dogged work. Eventually Kesteven were able to break from their own half with a lovely run from Champion Geroge. Champion then beat 3 Stamford defenders to be pulled down just short. In their desperation Stamford conceded a penalty at the ruck, and a quick tap penalty from Davey Hodgson took himself and everyone else by surprise and he romped home from at least a metre out, completing the run in well under 10 seconds, for Kesteven’s fourth and final try. Adman stroked home the conversion from a tight angle.

Stamford never recovered from this and the game ended with Kesteven in the ascendency pressing for a fifth try.

Thanks must go to Headlock and DanDan who kindly donned the purple and white stripes for a half each to help Stamford reach a full XV - both were markedly more handsome in the Black version.

It was a great performance from Kesteven with several players missing, Special gave an outstanding performance at fly half, whilst Champion George and Davey Hodgson also put in their performances of the season.

Final Score Stamford 0 - Kesteven 24

Team:- Bash, Tobias D of W, Davey, Shotgun, Hightower, Nightmare, H, Monster, Smokin’, Special, Champion, Llama, Jacko, Adman/Mr Blond, DanDan, Bash 2, Headlock, Finbar

Author - Tom Price with unauthorised insertions from his co-Coach.